I realised that I should make some form of introduction or explanation for why this blog exists. A little late but whatever. This page exists for two main reasons.
One, I wanted to work on the website some more to just get experience with web development. I thought that I would make a blog portion because it’s just something to do. I made this website because I thought it would be cool to have “bezray.com” go somewhere. PREFERABLY SOMEWHERE THAT WASN’T A SCAM WEBSITE!!! If you search up “bezray” on YouTube you will find a handful of “scam alert” videos warning that “bezray.com” sells fake products. I don’t know who bought out this domain before me, but apparently they were using it to sell fake barbeques or whatever. I’m really glad that they dropped the domain, but it’s kind of funny that this is part of the “bezray.com” legacy. Another reason is that I’m also somewhat displeased with the fact that everything is a Discord server or someone posting on Twitter on the modern internet, and I’m especially displeased with the ID verification bullshit that governments have been pushing lately. I know that this website design is kind of boring, but that’s not because I’m trying to be minimalist or “fit in”, I just am really bad at designing websites so this is the path of least resistance for me.
Two, I’ve been feeling a bit creatively unfulfilled right now. Sure, it’s nice to just do nothing and play video games except after a while, it gets pretty old and makes you feel like a burden to society. To satiate this need for creativity last time, I started work on the Half-Life video. Unfortunately, I haven’t found another video that I have the same creative drive and passion for, I have some ideas but I’ve already sunk quite a bit of time and effort into this one video idea. The idea is fine, but I don't have a huge amount of motivation to work on it, but I really don’t want to scrap it, which kind of leaves it in limbo. I’ve been trying to do some music production with FL, but I’m just a novice and while I am having some fun, I haven’t made too much that I’m proud of yet. I hopefully will eventually, but right now I still feel a need for something more. I could try learning art, but I have tried many times in the past and every single time I’ve given up. I really just don’t feel the need to learn how to draw, it would of course be nice to know but I have really tried and I’ve just kind of accepted that I’m not very good and that it would take a long while to get good. So that leaves me with writing. I have been interested in writing for a large part of my life. I used to make comics and larp as big nate when I was in grade 3ish. I still have these stories and comics to this day, and while they definitely do not hold up I still found some parts of the stories and comics to be semi-good. Something else that I’ve done with writing is, YouTube! A big part of making YouTube videos (for me personally) is writing. Making a script is a huge part, because if I don’t say words correctly, the video will just not be very good. Especially when you’re me who can’t think of much to say on the spot while recording, most of the jokes and general flair will need to be done in voiceover.
In essence, this website/blog is a way for me to be able to get my musings out. Writing for yourself is nice, and I do journal, but sometimes it feels more comforting to send your thoughts out into the world. I’m sure that not many people are reading this, but I wouldn’t know; I don’t have very detailed statistics for website visits and the statistics I do have access to are diluted by bots and web crawlers. But I can’t imagine that too many people would be clicking on “bezray.com” and going to the blogs. But for you, thank you for reading. I’ll make sure to be writing more in the future, and maybe (hopefully) you might enjoy some of it.
- bezray
